"Nobody’s perfect" and "To love is to risk getting hurt" are cliches that can at times cause one to tolerate unnecessary chaos or avoid relationships all together.
Yes, it is true, relationships are risky and hard choices to make.
That truth can be clouded by the initial phases of relationships, which include admiration and pursuit.
But when the newness wears off, and the comfort sets in, you're triggered or the opportunities present for healing to take place, you can feel the risks and the hard choices associated with being in relationship and with choosing yourself and your person consistently.
The beauty of relationships is that they teach us and reveal to us more about our internal selves. We are relational beings. We are in constant relationship with everything and everyone around us. As Black Athletes, it can be easy to lose sight of the value of relationships when the priority is so often on winning and a version of success that you must acclimate to. Yet what outlasts any win or loss are those bonds that are cemented with genuine connection, laughter, similarities, love, friendship, shared values, experiences, and memories.
& Yet, just like sports, relationships have their seasons.
Seasons of high connection and high energy, and seasons where more space and more focus is necessary. Seasons of calm and seasons where applying solution to challenges has to be the intention.
Sometimes, these seasonal flows are taken personally or as personal attacks. Because two people can be in two different seasons at the same time, and thereby have different needs and desires. Wellness is about having the freedom to access what you need.
How would you describe the season your relationships are in right now?
What do you need from you and from others during this season?
Written by Kheri A. Corbin,
For those experiencing relational changes,
For those Black Athletes,
And the ones who genuinely love them